Today I noticed that my daughter was making funny noises which oddly resembled sex sounds my wife makes. When I asked her what she was doing she said "I'm pretending to be mommy from last night." I was on a business trip last night. FML

今天，我发现我女儿在模仿很奇怪的、听起来像我老婆在OOXX时发出的声音。当我问她你在干嘛的时候她说“我在学我妈咪昨晚的声音”。我昨晚出差。FML

Today, after my girlfriend of 2 years left me for another guy, I got stuck in an elevator for 3 hours. With both of them. FML

今天和我相处2年的女朋友离开了我和另一个男人好了， 然后我在电梯里面卡了3小时，和他们2个一起 FML

看得笑喷了……

太有意思啦～～～又来看了一遍哇咔咔卡

真不错！

[posted by wap]

神了，mark

神了！

[本帖最后由 雾桑 于 2009-7-28 21:16 编辑]

很有意思的

[posted by wap]

太欢乐了

换了贴收藏先

学英语？这贴神了.......................................

神贴 跑那个贴吧学英语去

可乐~~收藏一哈~~期待继续更新~~

英语水平一下子上了一个台阶 很神

好贴。。。

没了～？？？？？？？？？？？

Today, this really attractive woman that I've known for years told me that when I can have sex with her standing up, she'll have sex with me. I'm confined to a wheelchair. FML

今天，一个我认识了很久的很性感的女人跟我说，如果我能站着和她做，她就和我做。我残疾坐轮椅。FML

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML

今天，我在和我的男朋友OOXX。当他要丢了的时候，他突然声嘶力竭地大喊“太棒了Brittany！！”我的名字不是Brittany.Brittany是他的妹妹。FML

这个要马克……

这些东西太有意思了…

太神了，顺便练习了下英语的阅读，并掌握了几个词组，如：
be about to orgasm，at the top of his lungs等等。
既知识，又欢乐，寓教于乐啊！

[posted by wap]

再看一边还是那么欢乐哈哈

FML到底什么意思？

PS：请回答中文，看得懂英文就不会问这个问题了。

卧槽

ls 没有办法用中文100%理解的, fxck my life 在英文里面也不是常用句.
我翻过来就是"操tmd倒8辈子霉了" 肯定不明确, 但是就那么个意思.

语气因该还会强一点, 因为这个里面的故事都是极品.

应该翻译成“生活真操蛋”

233,BB上有一款专门看FML的软件=。=
挺不错的

Today, I was running late for work so instead of walking the ten minutes to the office, I took a taxi. The driver took the opportunity to share the story of his first sexual experience with a man. In great detail. FML

今天，我上班要迟到了，所以我没去走那十分钟的路程而是打了辆出租车。这司机抓住这一大好时机，向我讲述了他第一次和男人OOXX的故事。具体而又生动。FML

这贴有s1的传送门吗？

Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML

今天，我在邮箱里收到了我的护照。他们把我的生日搞错了。然后我找到了我一起送去申请护照的出生证明。结果我发现我的父母16年来一直在错误的一天给我过生日。FML

Today, I was driving down the road at about 10pm, when the passenger in the car in front of me threw something out the window. The object flew towards and landed directly on my windshield. It was a condom. A used condom. It wasn't tied. Semen spreads out quite a bit when you're driving fast. FML

今天，大概晚上十点多我在道上开车。我前面车里的乘客向窗外扔了什么东西。拿东西径直打在了我的挡风玻璃上。那是个套套。用过的套套。而且用完没系。JY在你开快车的时候散开得很快。FML

Today, I asked my boyfriend of almost ten months who his top five women to have sex with would be. I was third. My mom was second. FML

今天，我问了交往了将近十个月的男友，他最希望和哪五个女人OOXX。我排第三。我妈排第二。FML

FML是寂寞党驻美国分部

太直白了

一页一页，居然全看完了，这贴神啊，笑死了

HD点应该直接都贴出来嘛~~~

老外真神奇

今天，我听到了我父母在OOXX。试着做一位看得开的人，我马上打消了奇怪的想法，因为我知道食色性也嘛。我快速地经过了他们的房门，可是就在此时我的猫经过我身边跑进了他们的卧室，把门给撞开了——现在我的父母以为我在偷看，而且需要看心理医生。FML

Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML

今天，我在一家特别拥挤的体育馆里面，突然我身后的一个人在我的耳边大嚎了一声，差点把老子吓得拉裤子里面。我在众人面前跳了起来并摆出了个空手道的姿势。我身后没有人。实际上是我耳机里面传出的一首新歌而已。一个教练问我需不需要救护车。FML

Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML

今天，我在上课的时候睡着了。我的教授想耍耍我，用了个汽笛来把我叫醒——我吓得半死，结果一拳砸在我旁边女孩的脸上把她打晕了过去。FML

Today, I finally had my tongue piercing heal up so I decided to try oral on my girl. Unfortunately, she has a hood piercing that got caught on my tongue ring, and neither of us could get them apart. We had to call my mom in to solve the problem. FML

今天，我终于在舌头上上了个舌环，所以我决定给我的女友KJ。不幸的是，她在她那里上的环和我的舌环缠到一起去了，我们俩怎么努力都分不开。最后不得不把我妈叫来解决这个问题FML

Today, I was at my girlfriends house with just me and her. Things began to get heated and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it I decided to whisper in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I hear behind me, "I am." FML

今天，我和GF单独在她家里，激情之下我们开始在客厅里干起来，快结束时我在她耳边问：“谁是你daddy？”背后传来一个声音：“我就是！”